5.09.2012

Sometimes I Need to Listen to Myself

Yesterday was kind of a crummy day. Which is odd because it started and ended so well.

I woke up to my alarm, got Rachel and Lucy ready, drove them to school, and arrived at the Marriott at 7:53 am, a whole seven minutes early for the Girl Scout Utah Founder's Day Breakfast.

I sat around a table with other members of the Junior League of Ogden and listened to personal stories of how the Girl Scout program had helped girls gain courage, confidence, and character. About ten minutes into the program, I realized that I'd forgotten to take any medicine for my sinus cold. And I didn't have any tissues with me. Right after an especially touching account was shared by an adult Girl Scout Alumnae, who I know, the young Girl Scouts walked around the tables and handed out pledge forms. But I had somehow missed the part about the breakfast being a fundraiser. And, in my efforts to be more ladylike, I had left my "baby bag" in my car and gone into the event empty-handed. While everyone at my table pulled out their checkbooks to make donations, I just sat there. And tried not to be bothered that just because I don't drink coffee doesn't mean I'm not thirsty; the server never once bothered to refill my orange juice. Oh yeah. And I might have been a tad bit jealous listening to a couple of the ladies talking about their easy jobs. Ones that pay them money.

I went home to a house that looked like a tornado had swept through it. Steve has lots of strengths, but keeping the house clean while watching kids is not one of them.

I cleaned up, got Adam and Kaleigh dressed and ready, drove kids to preschool, ran some errands, enjoyed a quick lunch with Steve, and went home to get back to work on my never-ending saga with the IRS. They are still refusing our claim for an adoption tax credit from back in 2005. The invoices from the lawyer bills that I have submitted (and resubmitted) clearly show the lawyer's name with the fee charged, date paid, and a zero dollar balance. And the signed affidavit from the man who did our home study? They won't accept that expense either because he only states that he charged us $600, not that we actually ever paid it.

By then, it was time to pick up kids from preschool, and we went to the octopus carwash. That was definitely the highlight of my day. If you ever need a good laugh, come pick up my kids and go to an automatic carwash. Worth every penny. We ran a couple of errands and then drove Max home. Adam and Kaleigh both took off their seat belts, and Adam snuck out and hid behind Max's bushes because he wanted to stay and play. I coaxed Adam out, but he was asking what we were going to do fun that day. I told him he went to preschool, and that was fun. But he wanted to do something special. "Not every day is special," I told him.

We settled on chicken nuggets from Chick-fil-A. Mostly because I had some time to kill and a coupon for a free shake. And then I decided to be nice and take the shake to Steve and work. Four phone calls and twenty minutes later, Steve finally came out to the car to get his half-eaten shake. (I went to Chick-fil-A to kill some time. . . not all afternoon.) I drove to school, picked up all of the kids, fielded a few "You're packing them in like sardines" and "How many kids can you fit in there?" comments, and came home. (The answer is seven.) And then it was Rachel and Lucy's turn to ask what fun things we were going to do. "Today is a workday," I proclaimed. They just moaned.

Lucy pulled out just about everything you can imagine on the kitchen table and went back to work on her invention, a science project that she has logged a ridiculous amount of time on. Paints, glues, soda cans, magnets, and every variety of tape that we own.

I received my third phone call from a lady calling about a mattress I have for sale on KSL. I spent fifteen minutes answering all of her questions (again). And she still couldn't make a decision. I'm all about product research, but this is a brand new memory foam mattress and I'm selling it for seventy-five bucks. I saved her number and will not be answering her next call.

Then it was off to run more errands. I went to Zions Bank and picked up four months of bank statements from 2005 that cost me twenty dollars to have them pull up. . . only to find that they didn't have the correct charges listed on them.

We went to DownEast Home to return a v-neck tank top that I bought the day before. They were my favorite for layering, but they discontinued the solid colors and just came out with a printed pattern. I thought I'd give it a shot, but they also changed the fit and instead of being nice and long, they are now short and wide. Grrrr.

As soon as I walked in the door at Staples, I realized I had forgotten to bring the Staples Rewards that I had printed out and left on the kitchen counter. We need envelopes, but I didn't want to pay for them when I have Rewards that need to be used before they expire. So I recycled my ink and walked out, empty-handed. And then I realized I have a pair of sandals that need to be returned to The Children's Place and a shirt that needs to go back to Ross. Why didn't I remember to bring them with me??

Then we were off to Michael's, in search of more supplies for Lucy's invention. She walked in and out of the automatic doors five times while I called Roosters and placed a to go order for dinner. (It seemed like the perfect night to use the gift certificate we've had since Christmas.) Lucy picked out the adhesive magnetic tape that she needed for her magnetic pencil holder, but only after touching every single thing in the store. And while we were standing in the check out line, she went ahead and poked her finger through the cellophane gift wrapped basket at the front counter.

We picked up dinner from Roosters and went home. Steve was mowing the lawn. Rachel was pushing Adam and Kaleigh around in the stroller. And we enjoyed dinner in the backyard. I vented about some of my frustrations and announced that all was good in the world again. And then Lucy sprayed her soda all over me. (Yes. It was a soda for dinner kind of a day.) Steve complained about his food. Kaleigh wouldn't eat any food. And I suddenly felt as if I hadn't accomplished anything. Then I started feeling like a horrible wife and mother. Steve was home from work with no meetings and we had no other commitments for the evening. I was being snippy with everyone, hadn't been able to pull off much of a dinner, and the likelihood of reading scriptures together was not looking very good. (As much as I love having Steve home, sometimes it really throws my routine for a loop.)

I took care of a disciplinary problem with Adam and then went and notified Steve that I was clearly having some hormonal issues and needed back up. (Five years after my hysterectomy, and it finally occurred to us. . . actually Steve. . . that I still have a hormonal cycle and am not always at the top of my game. I suppose that's another story.) But Steve was out tilling the garden, so I bathed Kaleigh and Adam, and got them ready for bed.

Then I went downstairs, looked in the fridge, and realized there was no milk and no bread. Why didn't I check before I went and ran errands??

Lucy was still working on her invention (a magnetic pencil holder) so I sent her outside to tell Steve he needed to wrap things up with this silly project. Thankfully, he came in and took over.

Washing the dishes and folding some laundry proved to be good therapy for me. And it's amazing what sudafed and ibuprofen can do for a sinus infection. I tackled the red basket of loose papers on the counter and pulled myself together just in time for. . . a visit from PAUL!!!

While I was showering last night, I was feeling really guilty about the day, and spent some time trying to process everything in my head. And then it hit me. Not every day is special. Sometimes we actually have to work. And sometimes I need to listen to the words that come out of my mouth. Nothing horrible happened yesterday, it just wasn't special. And, according to me, that's okay.

4 comments:

Fox said...

O that is great advice!

Courtney said...

You are so right, good food for thought. I am glad I am not the only one who has days like that.

Rebecca said...

Hey! That's how I feel most days!

Kristin Wilkerson said...

Glad I read this post. I've had a really crappy/emotional week and it made me feel better. Thanks Em.